Towers of Midnight
Mistrusted Guardians

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The Dragon Reborn was the one who led the circle that created the caves inside the Dragonmount, men are very strong in Earth, which explain how it was done so easily with a circle that held no more than twenty, while the entire White Tower couldn't perform such a task.

The Dragonmount's caves are planned to hold more then five millions people, if need demand, and feed them all for two or three weeks. Arrogance beyond comprehension, for one man to do such a thing all by his own, all of Tear's supplies unneeded for the Tear not to starve were wiped out completely in order to fill the Dragonmount's emergency storehouses. Arrogance beyond any human comprehension, for the Dragon to create such a thing; yet, Rand al'Thor, as Lews Therin in his time, was known to accept no limits in his way to achieve his goal.

But, unlike Lews Therin, Rand al'Thor was ready to accept that despite his title and position and power, he is still a mere human being. His lack of ability to understand that, encourage by others who, seeing his success and ability, placed him as high as the Light himself, led Lews Therin to his doom.

Kinslayer and the Lord of the Morning
By Halima Albar
The Black Tower
The Forth Age

"Where is the man whom I arrived with? He is called Der Cal?" Ilyena inquired coolly of the black clad man who stood before her, eyeing her stonily.

"I don't know," he said. The truth was in his eyes, he did not know. But perhaps she had been hasty in dismissing the other man earlier, in her anger. Perhaps he could tell her where the other was.

"Where is Valir? Another one of you, a man in black," she asked.

"He went to eat something," The man said softly, he eyed for a moment. Not at all like a man stared at a woman, she felt like he was searching for weaknesses, ready to strike at any sudden move. "I will call him for you." He didn't completely turn his back to her as he retreated toward the door.

"Stop!" She said flatly, commandingly, all the dignity and power of an Aes Sedai of the Age of Legends in her voice and stance. The man stopped, his look turning wary and somewhat shocked. "Where is he?"

"I can take you to him," the man said, surprise at his own words plastered all over his face.

Ilyena inclined her head once, and said, "Then do so." The man in black began to walk, his directive stride at odds with his frequent incredulous glances, searching her for a sign of what could be making him lead her. She smiled inwardly; men remained the same, despite all the time passed. Of course, the man had never heard Lews Therin commanding, apparently, she learned much from her husband in that matter. Somehow, he seemed to have the ability to make people's body move without the interference of their minds.

"Do you... know the Lord Dragon?" the man asked hesitantly, several minutes later.

She glanced over at him, one golden eyebrow raised. "Once, I knew him very well indeed," she said, not quite sure why she was answering to this unknown man. "Married people do know each other quite well, you know."

"And now?" he asked softly, ignoring her sarcasm.

"And now I shall see," she said, more to herself than to him. Yes, that was what she would do, Ilyena resolved. Get to know Lews Therin once more, learn who and what he was in this life. And once that was done, it would remain to be seen what would happen thereafter.

Half hour later, and the man finally stopped at a large, cavernous room, swept an arm out in a grand gesture, and said, "He is here, my lady." The corridors he led her in seemed to be endless, and she saw not one window. The corridors were illuminated by means of small fireballs. They passed few people in the corridor, a boy in black with a woman at least twice his age. They were arguing softly, something about veils and weapons. The woman demanded them back. The boy refused. She saw a woman with red eyes, walking as if she had every intention to walk through the rock if she had half a chance. And three men, also in black, that looked back often and looked hunted.

"Aes Sedai," she corrected him, noting the grimace, knowing that he must have known, considering her demonstration of the night before, sensing that he did not enjoyed it in any case.

Nonetheless, he nodded curtly, said, "Aes Sedai," before turning around, and marching away. Ilyena entered the room, noting the milling people, groups chatting, eating, arguing and many other such activities. A recreational room of sorts, she surmised. There were people eating in the corner. One thing she noted was the glares, most of the women, despite wearing soft expressions, glared at the men they were talking with. And more than one set of eyes were accusing. Most women were tall, that she saw. And fair, they moved in the soft easiness of trained warrior. It was sad that in this age they had to fight as well as in the end of the Age of Legends, as her time was called now. It was never far from the surface, the most brutal instincts, as they have sadly learned in her age.

Her eyes glide over the crowd, she saw the curious and surprised glances on the faces of few, and the dismissive glances of those simply noting the arrival of one more being to the room. Finally, she saw Valir, chatting with another man who wore the same black and sword pin. A somewhat older man who wore only black and no pins approached the two, who answered whatever he said, but turned him away coolly after a moment, dismissal plain in their attitude. Thoughtfully, Ilyena narrowed her eyes. Perhaps they simple did not like the man, but she was beginning to suspect that those pins were rank's symbols of a sort.

Walking over toward them, she noticed the man that Valir was talking to tug him on his sleeve and gesture over to her. Valir's face registered a rather surprised look the moment before she arrived before him. "Hello," she nodded.

"Um, Hello, Ilyena Sedai," he nodded.

"I offer my apologies as to my behavior towards you earlier this day. I did not appreciate waking with a watcher over me, but you did not deserve the treatment, none the less." The other man looked a little unease, thought she couldn't say why. Beside the Sword pin Valir was wearing, the man also had another pin; shaped as a dragon, she noted that one before. It seemed to be that Lews Therin's sense of humor become stranger than it was in the Age of Legends.

"Thank you," The man said, surprise clear in regards to her apology. Inwardly, she smiled. She was tilting him off balance, to be sure.

"You're welcome. I am attempting to find my bearings in this place," she smiled, deciding that she would elicit the desired information from this man, instead of haring all over the place looking for Cal. "Could you tell me where we are?"

"You don't know?" he asked, surprised.

"No, I don't. I arrived here by a method which does not name map names."

But didn’t you have to know where you were going?" The other man asked; eyes sparked with interest.

"I was heading for a person, not a location." She explained.

"There's such a weave. At least not that I know of, I don't think it's even possible. It would require you to work with the threads of the pattern directly, to start with."

"Yes. Do not think of learning it," she said, "It is extremely dangerous, and was discovered by a female, never to be adapted to saidin. And for very good reasons, it was banned by the Hall," She said, looking meaningfully at him, so as to disabuse any notion he may have of trying it himself, even should he be aware of the greater machinations of the weave.

"The Hall of Servants exist no more," The man shrugged, unaware of the affect his words had on her, "And the only favor any Asha'man will do to the White Tower's hall is destroy the place. It sound ..."

"Deadly in potential," she said curtly.

It seems to have no affect on him, "So does saidin, Aes Sedai." He told her, "And still we use it. Beside, there is always more fun when you dance on the razor edge rather than on safe ground." How did Lews Therin do it, making men and women so loyal to him that they were ready to die for him without hesitation?

She did her best to ignore the man who stare at her with disturbing set of eyes, as if he was trying to read her mind. She had the feeling he was seeing through her skull. "Where are we?"

"Inside the Dragonmount."Surprise washed over her, shock and vague horror. Dragonmount, she had read of it, of the place that Lews Therin had died and was suppose to be born at. The place he had made of it his fortress. Vaguely morbid, she mused, but ironic in a manner he could appreciate as well as dislike. No doubt the real reason for his choice had been necessity. For what, she did not know, but duty and necessities were very often, all too often, his driving characteristics.

"Ilyena Sedai?" Valir asked warily, her expression was of stun shocked, she calmed it as soon as she noticed it.

"Yes," she said, "Thank you for telling me that," she paused, deliberating with herself, "Perhaps you could be my guide." Could Lews Therin attempting a joke? His sense of humor could be... peculiar at times.

"Um," he said, "Well, I have duties that...."

"Oh no, you don't," the other man suddenly broke in, eyes shining, "Not these days. Nothing to do yet; nor will you've, I will take care of that. You’ll have plenty of time to show the Aes Sedai around." Ilyena gave him an exasperated, knowing look, and the man grinned, giving her a mock toast with the glass he held. His grin wiped out suddenly, and his head titled suddenly, as if listening, "She is coming," He said suddenly, "I can't allow myself to be caught in..." He glanced at her and cleared his throat, "Valir, don't let her out of your sight! Not for you life!" He commanded, "My... warder is not quite pleased with her. She might decide to take actions, and I've no wish to explain to the Lord Dragon why she died, again." Did he think she was helpless? She was about to say something, but he moved, almost ran, away before she could say anything.

"Well," Valir hesitated for a moment. "I'd have to ask... Well, maybe I wouldn't. I mean. Well, okay," The last was said to the man's back. She saw the man that gave orders so curtly stopping at the door, his back hided who he was talking to, but as they turned to go, she saw a small woman, with blond silvery hair walking near him away from the room. Talking urgently, although they were too far to hear a word. Just now it accrued to her that the man intentionally positioned himself to hide the woman from her eyes, and vise versa.

"His...warder?" Ilyena asked, she knew women that were so jealous they immediately suspected any woman their man was talking to, but only talking rarely led to murder attempts, as the man strongly suggested.

"Wife," Valir said slowly, his eyes focused on the pair that stepped out of the room. "Not of his choice, but wife still."

"Not of his own choice?" Ilyena wondered.

"The Lord Dragon forced it on him, so to speak, and nearly killed the three of them half the way through." Valir said absently, "She is very dangerous, and she isn't the only one."

"Lews Therin? Forced them to marry?" That sound extremely... unlikely, but what wasn't, this days. "What would he do such things?"

"Because if he wouldn't, he would have to stay marry to her, and his other wives wouldn't like it one bit." Valir clump his mouth suddenly, looking down at her.

"This is... madness." Ilyena muttered; if he wouldn't have force that tall man and the woman with silver hair to marry Lews Therin had to stay marry to that silver hair woman? And what other wives Lews Therin had. In plural, not singular, to add to the confusion, as if there wasn’t enough on her mind already.

"I agree," Valir said, "But on the other hand, little make sense near the Dragon Reborn. You don't make sense. Your very existence, I mean, not what you're doing."

She laughed sourly to that, "I understand." she said quietly, "Maybe, you could explain it all to me." She took him arm and led him away, hearing the chuckles of the other black clad man following them.

"Caught yourself a pretty one, boy." A man with brown hair and eyes, said as they walked to the exit. She frowned at him. And the smile faded. Valir looked both amused and angry all the while.

"She isn't mine, and she is taken, clear those thought from your head, Dorikel!" He said loudly to the man, turning his head back to him, as she didn't let go of him or stop walking.

They strode out into the hall and walked away from the gathering chamber for several minutes, seeing no others rooms during that period of time. As they approached the hall's end, though, Valir seemed on the verge of speaking. Ilyena, though her gaze remained firmly fixed forward, inwardly braced for whatever he would say.

A young girl in brown and gray breach and coat came running down the corridor flashed past them, brushing Valir and nearly whipping the black clad man's head around. The woman did not pause, nor even looked at him, and Valir scowled before turning back to the Aes Sedai. "Warders!" He muttered disgustfully. "What do you want to see first?" he asked as though it had not happened. "I’ll explain everything, but you said you also want to see this place."

"Give me the grand tour," she said with a small smile at the term, she wanted to scream inside. There was so much she didn't know.

The man sighed and said, "That may take a while. A long while." She had no idea whatever he meant the story or the tour.

"So I thought. Are you aware of where Lews Therin is?" she asked abruptly.

Valir blinked at the subject change and shifted his facial features uncomfortably. "No, he disappeared after your... arrival, he return here few hours ago, and then he was gone again." He answered curtly, and offered a grimace, indicating that it was not a topic he wanted to peruse.

Ilyena gave him an unreadable look and said, "And so he is sulking. No doubt brooding." The man looked somewhat shocked and annoyed at once, and Ilyena smiled. She could not help it. She knew well the habits of the man she's once called husband, and had no doubt that he was indeed sulking, but it did not seem that this young man could understand the concept of the Dragon sulking. Few ever did, he gave the impression that nothing can break through that shield of arrogance. Much did, despite the false hints. She gave another brief smile and said, "Be happy that you are here, rather than there, wherever there is. He's quite unbearable in such moods. Now, what of that tour? And the story?" The man flashed her another look before they reached the next chamber, which the man turned into, and began to point out features. His movementswere sure, his words slow and hesitated.

***

"Blood and Ashes," Rand cursed, watching Dyelin enterring the Grand Hall in the Lion Palace of Andor. Elayne asked him — ordered him, actually — to wait for her here. And now he had Dyelin to deal with. As if his meeting with Saedera wasn’t bad enough. And never mind that he deserved every bit of the maiden’s anger. He wasn’t ready to another confrontation, so soon. But still he turned and watched the noblewoman as she came closer to him.

"Do you’ve anything new to tell me about my daughter, My Lord Dragon, did you find anything?" The last shreds of hope he began to feel were wiped completely, and he hid a sigh. Dyelin did want to talk about her daughter, just as Saedera wanted to talk about the missing maidens. Elayne had told him about Dyelin’s daughter, and he made some quick checks, the truth was as Elayne suspected. Strangely enough, she wasn’t angry with him, despite it all being his fault.

"She was taken warder, Dyelin." He answered, trying to make his voice as soft as he could. "She and a friend of her, Lyandra. I’m sorry." No words could truly convey how much sorry he was.

By the stricken look on the golden hair woman, he didn’t manage to soften the shock. "I see," Dyelin smoothed her face, even thought it was clear how much it cost her emotionally. "Is there something, anything, that can be done."

Rand closed his eyes for a moment, fighting a sudden wave of fury. "No, I do not believe so." He replied slowly. By the Light, he would make the Asha’man pay! "I’ll make sure that Darian will bring her and Lyandra to Caemlyn, but I fear that it will not be possible for her to stay for long." There were several different weaves that could create a warder bond. The changes in the weave itself were minor, but the result was very often major. And the weave that Darian used in order to bond both Amelin and Lyandra would cause great discomfort for the three of them, if they were too far from each other, for too long. Blood and Ashes, it seemed that almost every Asha’man had his own version of the bond.

"Who is Darian?" Dyelin inquired, but her eyes were far off, and her voice almost lifeless.

"The dedicated that had bonded your daughter," He replied, and watched fire replace the lifeless look in Dyelin’s eyes. "Dyelin," He said softly, he truly felt sorry for her, for her daughter. And he was twice as angry with the Asha’man as she was. They were his, and they failed him. "Harming Darian would harm Amelin and Lyandra as well."

"I see," the light in her eyes died. "I thank you, my Lord Dragon." She said, and turned to leave.

He grabbed her shoulder and stopped her, "You’ve nothing to thank me about," He told her, "If there would be anything that I could do to make up for what was done to Amelin, Dyelin, I would. You’ve my word on that."

Dyelin nodded, and left, leaving him alone in the Grand Hall. Elayne told him to wait her here; she was already late. He looked up, at the painted glass above his head, the pictures of the ancient queens of Andor. He didn’t believe he could feel worse than he did when he left after his... conversation with the maiden who led the Far Dareis Mai in Caemlyn. But that short conversation with Dyelin had worsened his temper. He turned and walked out of the Grand Hall. He followed the bond to Elayne, talking the shortest route to her. He would wait her no longer.

He just reached at the entrance to her rooms, his rooms, once, when she came out. She changed her cloths; she didn’t wear the red and white dress that was embroidered with the Lion of Andor; the dress that belong solely to the queen of Andor. "Rand," She said, titling her head to look him eye to eye. Blue eyes stared at him warily. "You are going to the Dragonmount now, don’t you?"

"Yes," He replied softly, forcing himself to relax. It wasn’t as hard as he expected it to be. Elayne had a soothing affect on him. "I’m not done with the Asha’man yet."

Elayne blinked, then she moved forward and hugged him. "It’s not your fault, Rand." Elayne said, "There was nothing you could do to avoid it."

Rand said nothing; it was useless to argue with her. "Are you coming with me?" He asked instead. Stifling a sigh of regret when she moved away, he watched her eyes clouded for a single moment.

"I can’t keep disappearing, Rand." She told him seriously, "But I need to speak with Amelin and Lyandra, I promised Dyelin I’ll." Rand opened his mouth to tell her that he already told Dyelin that her friends would visit Andor soon, but closed it again as he seized saidin. Savoring all the glory, all the sweetness, and all the harsh, unwilling power. He opened a gateway, watching it turn and twist. He didn’t use the same kind of bond as Darian did. But still he didn’t like to have Elayne away from him. He chose to travel into his room in Dragonmount, but stopped after he took three steps away from the gateway. Unconsciously he moved to shield Elayne from whoever it was in his room. He felt no one touching saidin, nor the itching in his arms that warned him from a woman holding to the One Power. "Relax," the short woman said; rising from the chair she was seating on, she carefully marked a book and laid it on the chair. "I’m here to talk to you, not to kill you." With saidin in him, Rand could easily read the title of the book. It was Reason and Unreason by Herid Fel, one of the books Min especially cherished. Elayne moved forward from behind him, glaring at the silver hair woman that stood regally in front of him.

"What do you want, Mierin?" Elayne asked coldly. And Rand winced at the sharp tone. She still hasn’t forgotten him for the short time Mierin was bonded to him.

There was neither mockery nor anger in Mierin’s eyes; it made Rand feel a little safer. The bond to Narishma might have not stopped Mierin from wishing for power, but at least she didn’t seem to be interested in him anymore. "I found something that I think you might be interested in." Mierin said, she seemed to be serious. Rand groaned inwardly, he already knew it wasn’t going to be good. "I know what happened in to the Asha’man in Caemlyn."

***

It was three hours later when, back in the cantina room, as Valir named the room where she found him in, Ilyena smiled hazily and stretched, catlike, as she took a sip of her hot, brandy spiced cider. There were plenty of drinks, and they were quite good, unlike the food, very much unlike the food. After a partial tour of Dragonmount, relaxation had sounded nice, especially considering that she hadn't had any for a great deal of time. Even more considering the bits and pieces of the story Valir had given her. He claimed he knew as much as any else, but that was little, and the more she knew, the more confusing it was. Especially when he tried to hide several parts of the story, the most interesting parts, she suspected. She meant to drug them out of him, it was almost a talent with her, making people tell her their secrets, but that would come later, first she had to think of what he had told her. Thinking in greater depth about it, Ilyena surmised that she hadn't truly enjoyed herself in this age, and very little in those horrible last years in the one before.

Truth to be told, she had been sleeping in stasis for most of this age, but before that, it had been years since she had truly relaxed. The Aes Sedai figured she deserved a few moments of pure, unadulterated laziness, if only to forget her troubles, just now. Anything could be pushed back, now, she needed her mind clear now, and if half what Valir was telling her was true; she would skin Lews Therin happily. And the women he had now as well. So far, Valir was careful to name no names. And he still didn't tell her all of it. It was impressive still; it took Lews Therin less than a year and a half to reach his current position from the moment he declared himself.

"Explain the Asha'man to me," she said to her guide.

"Well," Valir pursed his lips, apparently searching for a way to frame his explanation. "You've heard about the taint," He stop for a moment and then continued, "Well, seven months ago, the Lord Dragon decided that he needed soldiers that could be used against the Dreadlords and shadowspawn that the Dark One would send against the world in the battles, and in Tarmon Gai’don itself. He recruited a former False Dragon known as Mazrim Taim to gather men with the potential to channel." He stopped to take a breath and avoided looking at her, "Not men with the spark, since the Red ajah already gentled most of them, not that there were many to begin with. Only four we know that appeared in the last three years, and two of

them declared themselves the Dragon Reborn before went to the Lord Dragon's side. And the Lord Dragon himself, of course, and then there is Narishma," She rose an eyebrow and he began explaining hastily. "The man I was talking with, the one with the bells in the hair, he's Narishma. He's supposed to be quite strong in the power, or so the M'Hael, the former one, figured, since he has the spark." Men that had the spark do tend to be strong, but there were levels to strength, and nothing promised that being born with the spark will mean strength in the power also, not to mention that there was simply no way men could measure out other men's strength. But she kept herself silent, she would explain it all further, but at the meantime, she had listened to his wards with every bit of concentration she had. "Eventually, the Lord Dragon named us the Asha'man, The Justice's Guardians or maybe The Defenders of Justice or something of the like." It was closer to The Defenders of what is Right, if she understood this language well enough. "A bare collar means you're a solider, the lowest rank, rather akin to a novice in the White Tower. A sword pin means you're a Dedicated, like an Accepted in the White Tower." A proud smile spread on his face saying that, and his hand touched the pin on his neck for a moment, then he became aware of her and snapped his hand down and flushed deeply. "A sword and a dragon pin mean you're a full Asha'man." He said quickly, "Which is of course, the male equivalent to an Aes Sedai, though we swear no Oaths." He stopped to take a deep breath, but Ilyena simply stared at him, urging him to say more, "Most of us don't like Aes Sedai," He smiled at that, and his eyes focused on someone behind her, "Some of us, on the other hand," He murmured to himself in obvious self pleasure, "like Aes Sedai far too much to be healthy." She turned her back to see what he was looking at, a black hair man, shorter than the average, but with a sense of overbearing.

"What is so special in him?" She wondered.

"He had taken Aes Sedai as a warder," Valir replied, "And with us, unlike the Aes Sedai, a Warder is very much equivalent to a spouse." He looked shocked at the idea he had just voiced, "Aes Sedai as warder, or as a wife." He muttered loudly, and shuddered. "Marrying the Dark One would be easier."

"Thank you," Ilyena said acidly, he gave a start and flushed again. She eyed him thoughtfully. The whole thing was very neat, very structured, and very purposeful. The man had not even denied it. The Asha'man were weapons. Perhaps they'd survive after the Last Battle, and perhaps not, but that was their purpose. It was very much Lews Therin's style, of later years; everything with a purpose, often grim.

"He does not lead you," Ilyena said.

Valir did not need to be told whom she was referring to. He shook his head and said, "Mazrim Taim was our M'Hael before. Our Leader. But he had gone," There was fierce light in Valir's eyes, and suddenly Ilyena remembered another man, short and fair hair and eyes, with eyes that were empty most often. Dejar Telil Mordy, the man who led the Hundred Companions, second to Lews Therin alone. She blinked, the purpose of the Asha'man becoming extremely clear to her. She would skin Lews Therin, indeed. Valir continued, unaware, of course, to the shock in her, "with a good many others. We have a new leader now, Logain Albar." The way he said the name made her wonder whatever he expected her to recognize it. " Some hoped that he would be the one to lead us. Others were terrified of the idea. He's... well, if you know him, then you know what I'm talking about."

"And what of yourself?" Ilyena asked emotionlessly.

"I roll with the punches," he said, grinning, and took a drink.

"I meant, what do you do?" Ilyena asked.

"I'm a Dedicated," he answered.

"Yes, but what do you do?" Ilyena asked again.

"Do?" He inquired, as if he never heard the word.

"Yes, as in what are your career aspirations? What do you do?" Heads have been turned to them, but she couldn't care less.

"I want to be an Asha'man." He had the goal to look confuse.

"You mean to tell me that you don't have a practical career, that none of you apply your skills in any manner besides epic battles against the shadow?" Ilyena said with incredulous sarcasm. Valir blinked, seemingly taken aback. "What do the Aes Sedai do?"

"They're Aes Sedai," the man said, eyeing her in much the same incredulous manner as she was eyeing him. "They don’t have to do anything. They are what they are."

"Oh, Light," she muttered, "Light, this Age is barbaric. You don't even apply yourself in any practical manner. You could be bettering the world, governing, teaching, inventing, and so many other things, and all you do is sit in your Towers and play at symbolism and rank! Light!" Fury coursed through the woman, her eyes burned, and her lips curled up into a snarl. "Fools!"

"Really?" He asked, his voice frosty suddenly, "How old are you, Ilyena Sunhair? How much it took you to reach your strength? How much before you finished whatever school it was where you studied the One Power?" He sounded angry, as if falsely accused. "Blood and Ashes, answer me!"

"I will not have this from you," She told him with serene face, "But, to answer your questions, It took me five years to reach my final strength, and I studied in the Academy for twenty years."

"You forgot mentioning how old are you," He said idly, but his eyes burned. "Ilyena," He Leaned closer to her, "I'm less than twenty, I've been in the Black Tower for two months, and I gaining my strength rapidly, as any other student in the Black Tower, strength gained too fast it to be safe. Until five days ago, I didn't know whatever I would go mad the next instance! You talk about career? What career a madman can have? What could we do that isn't deadly? What could we do to bring some good to the world save die for it?" He raised his wine cap and emptied it in one long sip, nearly quickening with rage. "Tell me, Ilyena Aes Sedai, what can we do that we haven't done. It took you five years to reach your strength, I know people who had done it in a month, less! Youhad a choice! You dare blaming us for not having the chances you'd. You dare blaming us for not planning our future when we didn't know whatever we will have one!" Anger melt away from him suddenly, "As for the Aes Sedai, you can blame them for as long as you would like. It had always been that way, but feel free to try change them, it's easier to lift a mountain. And words pass right through them, they never bother listen to you."

"Always been that way," she hissed, anger washing her, his explanation only made it worse. She could accept the Asha'man's attitude, but not the one of her sisters. "It has not always been that way! Once, we were teacher and inventors, philosophers and businessmen, athletes and actors, authors and politicians and so many other things! We touched the world! You... you turn your noses up to it, and sneer. Oh, we had our share of snobbishness, the Hall did, but it was nothing ... nothing! ... Compared to this Age, this barbarism! You disgust me! All of you," she hissed, before jumping to her feet and stalking away, leaving the Dedicated behind her.

The walls sped past her in a blur as she stalked forward, rage red across her vision.

Damn him.

Damn him for his arrogance, for thinking he could save a world which was already damned.

Horror clouded her vision, even as rage erupted in Ilyena's mind, and she Leaned back against the wall, breathing heavily, as though she had just undergone great exertion.

A faint tap up her shoulder made her jump, teeth slightly bare as she spun from the wall, only to face a finely formed Cairhien man's face, much shorter than she was. "Your killer and your love is a true cold-blooded bastard, Ilyena Sedai," Der Cal said, eyeing her warily. Ilyena blinked and made to retort sharply, but simply could not force the words past her lips. The man was right, though perhaps not for the reasons that Cal believed. "I've been exploring the mountain. Quite a fortress; I doubt anything could get inside."

"Nothing but the One Power," Ilyena said, "And it would take a great deal indeed of that."

"Yes," he said, "And there's a great deal of its wielders here. I'm not comfortable around women who can channel, never mind men."

"They say that saidin has been cleansed of its taint," she said. "Lews Therin has reversed his deed, there. I don't believe that he has any interest in reversing any deeds," she continued harshly. "He says to me that he would kill me again. But what of what he had done to our children? What of our children!" her voice rose into a shriek. "Do you know who I am?" she yelled at Der Cal. Saidar filled her with sweat warmth, feeding on her anger, feeding her anger, an endless chain. "I was his wife. He loved me. And he killed me. And the Dark One resurrected me, and kept me in stasis for an Age, to use me against him. But I doubt that that dark entity could use me very much, in truth. He doesn't love me anymore," she didn't stop to think that she was yelling at this man, pouring her heart of to a man she barely knew. All she could think of was her husband, the love she had lost, and those petty, jealous stares that had come from those women in that room where she had gazed upon Lews Therin for the first time in thirty four hundred years. He was changed, true, but he was still Lews Therin! It was in his eyes, in his voice, in everything. But he didn't love her! And they dared to glare at her spitefully, when it was her life, her death, and her love! How could they? Damn them all! Damn everyone!

"I hate this!" she screamed suddenly, at the top of her lungs, the echoes running down the halls, and Der Cal's face swimming in front of her eyes, shock plastered on his face. She understood that she was holding him above the ground, lifting him so she could stare at him eye-to-eye. Her flows tightened on his flesh. She couldn't care less. "Hate this!" screams, louder than ever before she could recall her voice being.

"I hate you all! Damn you, damn you, damn you! Lews Therin!" her voice trailed off into wretched little snarls, and suddenly, she recognized Cal's eyes, flickering behind her, and realized that someone else was there. Turning, she saw the Dedicated, Valir. She released Cal, and the man stumbled on the floor, fear making his face older than he was. With a strange detachment, she put along, slender fingers up to her face, and felt the smeared tears, knew she must look like a monster. Her clothes were twisted around her, again, and her felt absolutely miserable.

"What do you want?" she asked, not noticing the tears still running silently, calmly, down her face, not seeing the dangerous sparkle in her blue eyes, not feeling it, seeing only the man's face, seeing only his carefully blanked expression.

"I don't know what I want," he said. "You certainly haven't endeared yourself to me, or anyone else in here. I don't know why I'm here, but I have my orders. You might want to clean up," There was a tiny smile on his lips, "but just a little bit. You're not in your best shape right now."

"Tell me about it," she said, leaning back on the wall. A low chuckle escaped her, and then, she could not stop laughing, even as she stood up, and stumbled down the corridor. Leaving Cal on the floor, gasping pitifully for air.

Valir scowled after the woman, hearing her trailing, hysterical laughter run off behind her, hitting him full force. Did she not know caution? Did she not understand the precarious position she was in, just for being who she was, and here? Valir himself could hardly believe that the woman was who she said she was, but the evidence of the Lord Dragon's reaction was clear, and well explained, as Valir had overheard in her ranting, it did seem plausible.

He wondered why he'd agreed to play a tour guide for her. To be sure, Narishma urging him to do so had eased to the process, because Valir knew that the man didn't want to be seen in the same room as the woman, and so had been quite eager to see her leave. Narishma's wife would likely skin him alive, if she knew he had spoken a word to Ilyena, from what Valir had seen. Narishma was a full Asha’man, while he was merely a Dedicated. But that wasn’t all of it, he thought.

Be the reason as it might be, he had gone off with her, and she had been pleasant enough for several hours afterwards. The discussion over what Aes Sedai and Asha'man did, though, had truly upset her. The Age of Legends had been different, everyone knew that, but the Dedicated had the feeling that no one quite knew just how different it had been, save for those that remembered it.

Valir found it quite difficult to wrap his brain around that concept, that some of the people in the same mountain he stood in were almost four thousand years old. It was too incomprehensible. She needed a friend, he sensed, but even now, he wasn't sure that he was the one to be it. She was one of the elements, shunned by others, and seemed more than half-mad at times, truth to tell, though Valir knew that she was not, from the manner in which she had acted the last several hours. Gentle at times, but laughing in amusement at others, blue eyes sparkling wonderfully. It was rare that she took on the bossy, imperious manner of an Aes Sedai, though when she did, he mused, she was quite good at it.

The Cairhien, Der Cal, was rose from the floor and looked as if he wished he could follow the Aes Sedai, but didn't quite dare, no wonder, if he wouldn't have arrive, she might have killed the man. A moment more passed, though, and Valir scowled. I hate having a conscience, he thought irritably.

"I'll go her after here," he said aloud to Cal. He would make sure that there would be something found for the man to do, something nasty, to make him pay for what he was doing.

The man sighed and said, "Thanks."

"Indeed," the Dedicated muttered sourly, irritated the man thought he was doing it for him, before running off after an Aes Sedai that was older than this mountain.

***

"Oh," Elayne watched the silvery hair woman with hard eyes, Rand leaned on the wall and watched with eyes that revealed nothing and composed face. "They rampaged throughout my capital, bonded women without the women’s consent. Ravaged my throne room, terrorized the city. And you think there you’ve some kind of an answer that would excuse permit them to avoid paying for what they did?"

"Money?" Mierin blinked, "They are men, Elayne. Every last one of them could hand you your weight in gold. Paying wouldn’t mean anything to them, with saidin they can find in an hour more gold than most people see in a lifetime."

"That wasn’t what I mean," Elayne replied coldly.

"Ignore her, Elayne." Rand said in a calm tone. "This is what she consider as a joke." Then his eyes returned to the other woman. "What have you discovered, and how did you discovered this?"

"Your Asha’man do not shield their dreams," Mierin shrugged, "the hardest thing to do was to find ones that weren’t as mad as rabid dogs."

"None of the Asha’man is mad." Rand said sharply, "Those who went mad had been... dealt with." Nothing showed on his face, but Elayne could feel the flash of anger and remorse he felt, Min had told her about the Morr, in what seemed like a long time ago, but was barely a week ago.

"All I is that there are at least several thousands insane men that can channel somewhere in the world. Their dreams are worse than nightmares." For a moment, a frown crossed the small woman’s face. As if she had just tasted something foul. "But this isn’t what is important now, I understand that you’ve given Mazrim Taim and those Asha’man who had gone missing a week before you’ll set free the hunters. I suggest you will not wait, Taim had betrayed you."

"You found his dreams?" Rand’s voice was calm, the calmness of a deserted grave.

"His? No, I haven’t. But I’ve found the dreams of one of those who follow him. They revealed enough." Mierin replied. "Taim had converted to the Dark One more over one hundred Asha’man, and —" Elayne muttered silent oaths, but it was the look in Rand’s eyes that silenced Mierin.

Rand didn’t curse; Elayne thought she would’ve liked him to show some of his anger. "Carry on," He ordered, his voice cracking with fury. In the back of her head, Elayne felt the inferno of rage and ire that he radiated. Mierin felt it too, and the light of saidar enveloped her. Elayne studied the woman closely; she was ready to weave a shield. Elayne thought it was a shield, at least. She held on to the source herself, not that there was much she could do against a woman as strong as Mierin. The silver haired woman was stronger than Nynaeve. Stronger than any woman Elayne have met. According to Rand, Mierin and Ilyena were the strongest woman that could channel in an age where strength was commonplace. But Elayne never had the chance to judge Ilyena’s strength.

"That is about it," The woman said. "He was sent to you when you declared you amnesty, to train Dreadlords for the Dark One, and to make sure that those who aren’t his would be of no use for you. After all, you probably would’ve found a way to tutor those men. Apparently Moridin decided that it’s worth the risk of some of those men remaining loyal to you."

"I see," Rand eyes burned with barely control fury, "Sanctuary from the taint, that was what promised to them, wasn’t it? And the warders, you said that you know why they were bonded."

Mierin smoothed her dress nervously, she was no longer merely holding the shield, she held it, and poured every drop of the power she could master into it. Rand rubbed his arms for a moment, but the motion seemed more absent minded than indented. He could feel woman channeling, although all he knew was whatever she was holding on to the True Power or not. He seemed lost in fury, or, Elayne thought, not exactly lost, his eyes were intent on Mierin’s face. And she was willing to wager on Andor that he held on to saidin, to the extent of his ability, no doubt.

"I believe that the Asha’man were compelled," Mierin answered, she tied off the shield she wove and began to weave another weave. The light that shined from the woman brought tears to Elayne’s eyes. She didn’t think that she could copy the woman’s weaving, Nynaeve could hold that much of the One Power, and maybe when she would reach her full potential she would, too. But not now.

"How?" Rand barked, something flickered around Mierin, beside the shield, something that would be visible only to the eyes of woman that could channel. The weave carried some similarities to gateway, but was also quite different. "You think that Taim would’ve compelled the Asha’man to bond women. They can still be of use." Elayne directed a started look at Rand, was that how he thought of the Asha’man. Sometimes, she was willing to admit, it was better to think about people as tools in a game, that way you didn’t suffer so much when you had to make decisions. But you couldn’t think that way all the time, that kind of think was a sure way for disaster.

"No, I do not think that that was what he meant," Mierin concurred, "But, as you should know, intents aren’t always equal results."

Rand’s hands rose, his face were blank, his eyes ice. Something blue and green and white jagged its way from Rand’s hands to Mierin’s shield. Elayne put a hand on Rand’s shoulder, "This is not the way."

"With Lews Therin, it usually is." Mierin replied, "Do you want to kill me, Lews Therin? Or do you want to kill the truth?"

"The truth died with the Age of Legends," Rand replied, his voice far off, "What does it matter, today?"

Mierin brush a strand of pale hair from her face and frowned at the tall man, "It matters enough for you to try to kill me."

"Enough!" Elayne commanded, fist clenched, she felt like hitting them, both of them. "You said they were compelled, how, and to what end?" Rand opened his mouth, intending to speak, shout, actually, if she read his emotions correctly. Elayne wove air hastily, Rand’s eyes glared at her, his mouth was gagged. Mierin’s face showed open amusement. Elayne glared at Rand, if he would so much as dare to shield her, or cut her weave, she will make him wish he had never born. Luckily for him, he took no action.

"There are several types of compulsation," Mierin said, her eyes lighted with glee. "But all types of compulation are breakable, facing strong enough will. >From what I’ve seen, will is one thing that the Asha’man lack." Something crossed the woman’s face, wiping the glee away. With saidar flowing in her so strongly the pleasure bordered pain, Elayne could just barely hear the woman who once was the strongest of all the female Forsakens mutter something about men. "But if you compel the most stubborn man or woman to do something they want to do, they will never succeed in breaking the compulsation. That type of compulsation is often used to force someone to do something they want to do, but will not usually do, for various of reasons."

"And that was what Taim did?" Elayne asked, she knew more of Compulsation than most Aes Sedai, but she was still ignorant, compared to the knowledge Mierin possessed. For the first time, Elayne considered letting the woman teach her. Moghedien claimed that she knew nothing about ter’angreal, but if Mierin did.... "Forced them to bond women? Why?"

"No, as far as I managed to learn, the cleansing of saidin triggered the suggestions Taim had planted in the Asha’man minds. They were encouraged to channel, to use saidin to the limit, or beyond it."

Elayne shivered, it wasn’t something she could control, people that drew more than they could handle burnt themselves out. Elayne didn’t even want to think about this. The flow of air that gagged Rand’s mouth snapped suddenly, and she jumped, it felt like a whiplash. "How the bond has anything to do with this?" Rand demanded, "And if what you’re saying is indeed true, " By his tone, he very much doubted it, "then they should have all burnt themselves out."

"Oh," Mierin shrugged, "some of them have, surely. But they were encouraged to channel, and channel massive amount of the One Power. At one point or another the Maidens began kissing them, what do you expect them to do; if they loose all their self-control, they never thought, they reacted! I believe the weave Taim used created similar affect as drinking too much, they loose the restrains they should have."

Rand took a deep breath and closed his eyes, "Part of what the bond does to the bond holder has to do with self control," something that might have been a smile appeared on his lips. In never reached the eyes and vanished in heartbeats. "But why would they take more than one? The first should have taken care of the compulsation."

"Maybe they didn’t sober up so quickly," Elayne suggested.

Both Rand and Mierin glanced at her, Rand in approval, Mierin as if she forgot she was in the room. "Maybe," Rand muttered to her, and then turned his eyes to Mierin, "Where is Taim?’

Mierin looked at him oddly, "You know it doesn’t work like this, Lews Therin, I never found Taim’s dreams, all I know about him are what the Asha’man I’ve spied on knew. And it wasn’t easy, casting their mind the way I wanted."

"You always claimed tel’aran’rhiod as your kingdom," Rand shrugged, "I want Taim dead, Mierin Eronaile. Make sure of that!"

"It may take me quite a time," Mierin warned him, "And even more if he’s guarding his dreams, days at least, or weeks, if I’ll have to find him in the waking world."

Rand seemed indifference, "I don’t care how long it will take, Mierin. I want him dead."

"What about the rest, those of the Asha’man that went with him?"

Rand snarled, "Do you really need to ask?" Mierin nodded, and stepped back, the weave she wove before enveloped her and closed. When it faded completely, Elayne stared at where Mierin stood.

"She... vanished." She said, all she could see was quickly fading weaves, and the shield Mierin wove collapsing. The woman untied it a heartbeat before retreating.

"It’s similar to Traveling," Rand explained irritably, "but instead of a visible gateway, you create one that is hidden. It’s rarely used, it takes time to prepare, and too much of the Power. Its only advantage is that it’s much harder to follow you if you use it."

"That was what you did," Elayne accused, "when we first arrived, when you vanished in the fire."

"Yes," Rand turned to look at her, "It’s quite impressive, also." He seemed angry and frustrated, "you need to talk to your friends, don’t you? And I assume that Sorilea had arrived, I need to speak with her and Amys." By the look on his face, he wasn’t looking forward to the opportunity.

"I will talk to you before I travel back to Andor." Elayne said, coming closer and raising on tiptoes to kiss him. "And do try to rest a little." Then she turned and left him. She felt his eyes on her back while she crossed the room to the door; the stare cause her to smile.

***

Ilyena approached the door to her room, shoving it open, even as she cursed herself for her lack of self-control, only now catching her breath from the long bouts of laughter that had been ripped from her. Damn the whole situation! She almost wished that she was dead again, rather than having to put up with this. Light!

She stalked in, slamming the door shut behind her. Or at least, that's what she'd intended to do, but the satisfying sound of slamming door never materialized. Instead, the sound of footfalls did. Spinning around, she met the eyes of Valir.

Her first impulse was to shout or hiss at him, but that would simply perpetuate her lack of control. Schooling her features, she spoke with cold flatness.

"Why are you following me?"

"I know of at least four women who'd like you dead at this very moment," he replied with studied casualness. "Oh second thought, however, I could likely think of more. Beside, it's my room, if you forgot it."

She smiled and said, "I saw only three, but obviously, you're counting. Lews Therin has collected quite the little harem, there, hasn't he?" her voice was biting.

The man blinked rather blandly, and she saw the effort it was taking for him to maintain his cool front. "It might help," he said, "If you had something to do rather than stew in your own bitterness. I imagine it mustn't be pleasant, being in your position."

"How acute of you," she spoke acidly.

"Look," he said, suddenly straight speaking, "I came to talk to you, and maybe to be your friend, if you'll let me. Will you let me?" She eyed him with annoyance. She didn't want any pity, or any charity, which was obviously what he was offering.

"Leave," she snapped.

"Oh no," he said, shaking his head, "Not this time. You might be lot older than I am, and more powerful, but you obviously don't know your way around here, yet. And I have nothing else to do at the moment, so I'm going to teach you. And that isn't a request. I will do this," he spoke with determination.

"Really?" she asked with a small smile, "You are correct in one thing. I am more powerful than you are, I was one of the most power female Aes Sedai in the Age of Legends. I could force you to leave, or I could simply kill you," the last threat was false. She still served the Light, and would not kill a man who'd done nothing threatening to her, but she made it sound sincere. Still, she had to give him credit. He barely showed the flash of uneasiness he was feeling. After all, she had attacked Lews Therin quite effectively, nearly killing him before she was shielded.

"I am staying here," he said, pulling up a chair and sitting down, "And that's that." How did Lews Therin make men so careless of their own death, following him? Ilyena moved to say something, but paused. Someone was approaching, someone holding on to saidar, too strong, in truth, for a woman this Age. As strongly as very few could, even in her age. She narrowed her eyes and composed herself. It would not do to be seen out of sorts when whomever it was appeared. She smoother her skirts, a handkerchief took care of the signs on her face, then she said to the man in the chair: "Silence. Someone approaches," and sat down on a hard chair, ready to summon the Source at an instant's notice. A knock sounded upon the door, and Ilyena called out calmly, "Come in."

A long pause ensued before a lovely, pale, silver haired woman entered. Ilyena noticed Valir’s face; they were full on stunned horror.

Mierin walked through one of the endless hallways of Dragonmount with a determined look on her face. She knew where she was going; it was not something she looked forward to, but it had to be done. At least, it had to if she ever wanted to have peace again. She just had to settle this for once and for all. Still, she didn't have to like it.

Instinctively she reached out for Narishma through the Bond, something she had gotten used to the last few days. Narishma was a fool, if he thought she wouldn't notice why he was so eager to get her away from that room the Asha'man made into a refectory, or understand why he was so eager to get her away from there. She had to mute the fury and that surge of jealously, or else he would have known. He kept her near his side for as long as he could, but Logain called him soon afterward, and she got her chance to have a... chat with Ilyena Sunhair. It took a long time to find where the woman was hiding.

Mierin sighed, she didn't have enough sleep lately; she had always claimed she had total control over her dreams and Tel'aran'rhiod, but now she had faced fears and dreams she could not block away. One cannot block away memories as powerful and horrific as the ones we had during the cleansing. The subconscious will always be trying to dissolve it while one sleeps, she thought somberly. I haven’t had any nightmares ever since I learned to control my Dreams and enter the Unseen World.

There she was. Mierin looked at the heavy dark stone doors ... she truly began to hate stone ... and let her knuckles land on it. One thing about stone she especially hated was that they were so bloody hard!

"Come in," a pleasant female voice said from the other side of the door. A painfully familiar voice, one she had hoped never to hear again. How many times she dreamed about killing Ilyena?

Mierin drew a long breath and ran her fingers through her silvery hair, then she force herself to release her hold on saidar, before she entered. It has to be done if you ever want to find peace again, she told herself. Do what's necessary. Don't like it, if you don't want to, but do what you've to do. The last was something Lews Therin often said.

The door handle still in her hand, the only thing she saw was the golden haired woman, sitting on a plain wooden chair. Ilyena Moerelle Dalisar. Ilyena Therin Dalisar. Ilyena Sunhair. Blue eyes met eyes that once were dark pool, and now were clear blue, three shades above that woman's eyes. "What can I do for you, child?" she asked, friendly.

The old hate flared up once again. She felt it in her stomach, in her throat, as if it exploded. She almost embraced saidar, but then she noticed the Asha'man in the room, Valir Nensen. Of course, he would protect Ilyena. Mierin wondered if he would be able to shield her; but he might succeed when linked with that hay hair fool. Ilyena had been as strong as she was with the One Power. She heard herself say things to the other woman in a voice she did not recognize as her own. A low voice, dripping with all the hate and disgust she stored for ages. "Why have you come here?" She heard herself asking. "Do you still love him?"

Ilyena blinked, "I hardly have a choice, girl." She said sarcastically. "And what do you mean, still love who? I saw you with that dark boy with the braids when I came here, but never before. I don’t think we ..."

"Oh, but you know me," Mierin said, still with that low voice. And with the language she had learnt to speak so long ago; what the people in this age called the Old Tongue. She noticed her hands trembling with anger; she didn't seem able to hold them still. "I should settle this between you and me for once and for all. Right now. Balefire could do it." For that woman, she was ready to break the law she made for herself, balefire was far more than dangerous, to the user as well as to those it was directed to. She saw Valir tense, but was too focus in her anger to do anything about it. "I wish I could just use balefire, erase you from the Pattern and the source of all my problems in life would be gone. I'd never have to see that accursed face of you again. Maybe I could even forget what you have done to me." At the same time, she clutched to saidar, ripping apart a shield that was placed on her, Valir's shield, strong indeed, yet not strong enough to stop her. She wove illusion, it anger her, that she had lost her body. The beautiful body she had, all she could say about the body she had now was that it wasn't ugly. Now she had to use illusion to be herself again. Her eyes were focused on Sunhair's face. "Do you know me now."

Ilyena gasped for breath. "Lanfear!" Saidar flowed into the woman, an amount equal to what she herself was, Mierin had to give her that, the woman was no fool. Valir rose from his chair and took one step toward Ilyena before he stopped.

Mierin couldn't help smiling faintly, seeing that reaction. "I did not come here to kill you. I just came to warn you. Keep those Light blasted paws of you off him this time, you hay haired wretch, he is mine." She let go of the weave of illusion; she wouldn't be reduced to that. But she kept her hold on saidar, it was said that the hate between her and Ilyena was bested only by the hate between Lews Therin and Ishmael.

"Lews Therin would never allow a Forsaken in his presence. He locked you and your friends in Shayol Ghul! He would never keep you with him!" Ilyena said disbelievingly, a part in Mierin's mind noted that it was the perfect opportunity to attack, when the woman wasn't ready for it. She refused to listen to it, but it refuse to silence.

"Not a Forsaken. We called ourselves Chosen," Mierin said absently. She realized the door handle was still in her hand, and closed the opened door. She Leaned with her back against it, creating as much space between her and the other woman as possible. "Anyway, that's in the past now. I am no longer a Chosen. I betrayed the Shadow, my Bond with the Great ... the Dark One is now broken. Severed, by your beloved husband." Valir looked sick.

"And your body," Ilyena suddenly sneered, no longer shocked. "It's not an... improvement since the last I saw you. What happened to it, by the way?"

Mierin fought the urge to strangle the other woman, that other part in her mind had suggested some very interesting weaves to try on that cursed creature. "I died, the same as you did, but that is none of your business. I just came here to let you swear you won't touch him anymore."

"For the Light's sake, Mierin Eronaile, Lanfear, we argued about this a million times before. I was the one that married Lews Therin, not you!" Her cheeks were red; Mierin recognized this proof of the other woman's anger. Somehow they always got each other furious and raging. They always ended up screaming at each other, though they had only used the Power in their endless argument twice. Once was in Ilyena's and Lews Therin's wedding, the other was in the middle of the War of Power. The first battle was stopped by Lews Therin, the second ended with none of them dead. Both her and Ilyena considered it as a personal failure.

"Lews Therin?" Mierin lowered her voice and permitted herself to smile. "Who said I was talking about Lews? I meant Jahar Narishma, my husband. Did I forget to mention that I'm married." For some reason, Valir looked surprised, and afraid. The astonished look on Ilyena's face was worth most of the sufferings she had had recently. It was worth everything! Maybe even dying!

Silence fell in Ilyena's room, it could almost be heard. "You can not have your Lews Therin back, you know. And I will not have you going after Narishma."

The Asha'man in the room still eyed the two women suspiciously, waiting for the slightest sign from one of them to strike with saidin. Not that there was much he can do, beside turn the tide. Mierin felt a compelling urge to do exactly as he expected. For the meantime, Valir was just watching them warily; ready to cut in if it would become serious. He would go for Ilyena's favor, no doubt, and that was the only thing that kept her from the woman's throat.

As Ilyena overcame her surprise, Mierin continued: "And I can guarantee you that you have any chance with Lews Therin. Not anymore. The man has... other interests now, different from a long dead woman from the Age of Legends, as they call it now. He loves others, now, too." She grinned; Ilyena might be able to control her face, but not her eyes. It was almost better than killing the woman! "If you take a look at the whole situation, Ilyena, you came out of it with less fortune than I. We battled over his love, we both had it, and we were both killed and was killed for him. And now we are both back, and I have Jahar Narishma. But you have nothing."

Ilyena's sky-blue eyes narrowed; it took something from her beauty away. "We will see," she just said, in the same ireful voice as Mierin was talking with. "Don't gloat before you know everything, Lanfear. There might be some surprises to you."

Mierin almost laughed. "Indeed, we will see, but I wouldn't bet on your chances." She grinned at the woman, unable control her face. "Oh, one more point before I leave you. I know who sent you. I also know something about how Moridin wants to use you... I will watch you closely. If you ever think about betraying either Lews Therin or Narishma, or what they stand for, I swear I will kill you at the very spot. And enjoy every moment of it." The last she didn't voice aloud, she didn't have to.

Ilyena just looked with her with a glare full of hate. "Try me, Mierin. You never did it before. You never succeeded before."

Mierin just smiled. "Try me, Ilyena Moerelle Dalisar. Remember what I told you." She turned around slowly, leaving Ilyena in the presence of the Valir. She had surely given the woman something to think about. When she closed the door and walked back to the rooms she shared with Narishma, she felt much better. Some of the pressure on her shoulders was lifted. Suddenly she stopped and Leaned against the cold wall, she could repress it no longer. Her laugher began as a small giggle, but soon she laugh out loudly. Her entire body shaking with laugher; a red hair woman passed in the corridor, anger visible with every motion of her, the glare she gave her only made Mierin laugh harder.

***

They named us Shadar Sedai, Servants of the Shadow. A name given in fear and hate; a name we made ours with pride. We hide among them, unseen. And they move to our wishes, the Naeb’lis command, and the Light obeys. Strings tied so tightly they can never be broken, so cleverly that they would never be felt.

Shadar Sedai, The Dark Servants, we wait in the shadow we serve, wait for the moment to attack, to destroy. The Asha'man fear us, Aes Sedai shiver. They thought us to fight against the Shadow. Yet now we fight for the Shadow. Until the moment the Great Lord is freed, until the Wheel of Time breaks and the world remake in the Great Lord's image, shall we wait. Poisoned words and sharp steel; the One Power obeys to our call. We are their death and destruction. And they never know. Death waits for them from us, yet they never suspect. We belong to the Shadow, and walk among those who foolishly allied themselves with the Light. Their path leads to sure destruction. Our leads to eternal life, ruling this world for as long as time exist.

Betrayal shall be punished, failure shall be punished, success shall be rewarded.

Shadar Sedai’s words, believed to be their acceptance oath.

"It seems, Halima," Logain said, very slowly, he saw through red screen that obscure his sight. Without the Bond, she would have been dead again now, or wishing for death. Even she would find comfort in death if he could do to her half what he wanted, quarter! His hands were closed to fists. He had a vision of his hands around that pretty throat of that... He knew no word vile enough to describe her. She might have found a word fitting for her in that vast vocabulary of her. But even she would have to search hard. "That I'll be the one to teach our children that it's wrong to lie."

She sat on a chair in the quarters that were nearest to theirs, she seemed to have conquered the room, she and ten thousands cats or so. Of all the sizes and the colors that could exist. There was even a huge golden one that was five times the size of any normal cat Logain had seen in his life. And three dozens others he counted that were close to that monasteries cat in size. Yesterday's night, they all were in his room.

She had the gall to look pretty, seating with her legs crossed underneath her, black breach and coat that weren't as tight as Min's cloths. But were tighter than he would rather have her walk around with, there was also a small dark symbol on the left side of her chest. Where nobles often carried their house's sign. "What are you talking about?" She even sounded confused, and angry. How dared she?

She held saidin and was weaving something he never saw in his life. A mix of all Five Powers; the flows all centered into a cat, a furry tiny creature with deep silvery fur. He doubted if the creature was half the size of his fist. She didn't even look at him. Centering her attention on the bloody cat on her hip. "On second thought, Logain." She continued, "don't bother to answer. Return when your face wouldn't scare my cats."

He was too angry to hold saidin; something a distant part of him was thankful to. He had no idea what he might have done, had he had the One Power. Most the cats in the room were two or three months old, there were a large portion that seemed almost fully-grown, and of course, those huge ones that watched him coldly from wherever they laid. Unblinking stares that slide past the shield of fury that held him; the cats fled from him as he knelt by her chair. She spared him a single glance and snorted at his direction. "Go away, Logain. I'm busy. And I'm sure you must be, as well. Being a leader take much of your time, I know." Too much, already, with him barely two days in his new cursed position.

"You would listen to me, Halima." He told her slowly. "And you would listen to me now. If I had to tie you up to make you listen I'll. I swear you this by the Light!"

"Wait, then." Came the off thoughtreplay, "I can't let go of her now without risking her death." Logain stare at the cat she was holding, the creature was so young it didn't even open its eyes. "Now! I'd to put up with an hour of lecturing from Leanna and Toviene both! I want to know why you've lied!" His fisted landed on the chair's arm. It was made of thick wood, yet it cracked under his hand. She didn't even notice that. She was cold inside, the coldness of the emptiness one had to form in order to touch saidin, the coldness he was unable to create in his wrath.

She destroyed the walls of the hall and created a single room that was as big as some houses he had seen. And all around her lie those Light cursed cats! She withdrew her flows from the cat and gracefully rose from her chair, bending down to put the cat on the floor. Then she turned to face him.

Her fist landed on the ribs, it should have little affect on him. But he thought she broke three of his ribs; that was all he had time to think about, before he crashed into the floor. Fifteen feet from were he stood before. There were no cats were he had landed. And the cold floor was bloody hard. Saidin! The bloody woman used saidin against him!

Rage helped him ignore the pain as he tried to rise. He fell back on his back as something heavy jumped on him. That huge golden cat was baring its teeth at him. Standing on his chest, it looked much bigger than he thought the thing was before, and much heavier too. The thing Leaned its weight on the aching ribs. In purpose, Logain thought, as ridiculous it sounded.

Halima came near him and knelt by his head. Her hand touched her left side for a moment; she should have felt his pain as her own. "Now, let's begin again, Logain Albar." She said in that pleasant voice of her. "What was it that you said about children?"

His side ached, and few ribs were cracked or broken, she suspected. He was lucky she had time to calm down her anger. Or else she might have killed him. Ayende on him helped not a bit, she ignored the pain as she knelt near his head. His eyes were black storm, staring at her with boiling rage. How dare he? She was the one who had every right to be angry. She was surprised with herself, being able to control her temper so. She should have throw a tantrum or two at least by now.

The... cats weren't a fitting name for her creatures. Not anymore, at least. She would have to think for a while about that, she didn't want what happened to the Trollocs to happen to her darlings. They were gathering around them, the silvery female she had just finished with was the last one of them. She had great hopes for that silver fur kitty. So far, to her amazement, she lost less than a dozen. The rapid growing wasn't something she entered into them, at least not in purpose. But she was very pleased with that. If they only stop in the size she set to them. So far she had to take six of Flinn's Trollocs to satisfy their hunger, and it had been three days only! And there was the Gray Woman they also fed on, of course. And she supported them the best she could with saidin, but she wasn't Osan'gar, and her talent in that area was quite limited. "Now, let's begin again, Logain Albar." She said, as pleasantly as she could, had she could, she would have force him to eat his own heart. She was no great healer either, but any could duplicate the task of a heart with the One Power. She remember doing just that, very long ago, forcing a woman to eat her own heart after the woman sent false reports that disgraced her in the eyes of the Grea- Dark One. After that, there were fewer who dared crossed her path. "What was it that you said about children?" She meant to bear him no children, nor ever bed him, nor even share her bad with him anymore. There was only last night when he forced her to. And even Osan'gar would have to strain his abilities to make something of that. Beside, by what she felt, he already paid for that.

Ayende shifted her weight on his chest, leaning harder against him, sending tendril of pain into him, into her. Freedom, she named the big creature that she adored so much, a small joke she was very fond of. The man only stared at her, those dark eyes that stormed as much as his feeling in the back of her head. "Children?" He wondered. She could bear his pain no longer, even if he seems ready to put up with that to the end of time. Not even while she was a man she remembered once being so noble. Being noble was for fools, to her, when she still was he; it was to be used to charm the girls, never anything more. Especially after she betrayed the Light. Unlike Demandred or Rahvin or Bel'al, that although joined the Shadow, insisted on keeping old, worthless manners, especially when they have committed as much crimes and horrors as any of the Forsakens, her included. She flinched away from those memories, and glared at Logain. She pushed Ayende aside and hit him with a fist, right at his broken ribs. He groaned, she had to mute a scream. Torturing wouldn't work here, she never liked to endure pain, not her own nor others'.

She wove Healing, and he gasped, she felt his body, knew his emotions. For him, it felt like jumping into a lava lake, head first. "Would you answer me now, Logain?" She asked, as she offer him a hand to rise, and motioned her... pet away.

"Why did you lie?" He asked, rising from the floor easily, now that the pain was gone. He didn't take her hand.

She shook her head, "That is not the way it's about to work, Logain. Not from now on. You want your answers, I'll have mine too, then." He stared at her, stun. She seriously consider returning to physical abuse again, if he would insist on playing the stone head fool, she could stand the pain, for a little while, at least. "Take a seat and answer me, Logain. It's time for you to spread your cards; I want to know what game you're playing. I won't be a mindless tool, not ever again."

Luckily, there was another chair save hers in the room, at the far side of the room. Save that, the room was bare; there was a small pool to their right, the cats needed to drink. Flinn already brought them their morning Trollocs, and they left nothing but shattered bones. The thought amused her, a little. She entered a... taste for Shadowspawns flesh into her creations. Logain sat, every movement radiating anger. Fury even washed away tiredness; she didn't thought that he slept much those past few days. First because of cleansed saidin ... she touched tainted saidin once only, and she savored the glory of saidin as it was cleansed ... and then because of him becoming M'Hael.

Logain opened his mouth, as if to speak, yet she was ready to have none of it. "What have you meant about children, Logain?" She demanded.

"Would you answer my questions, if I answer yours?" He asked, she suspected that only the Bond prevented him from attacking her physically. That small tidbit sum most of what she knew about the Bond. The weave she remembered made no sense, it should have killed Logain, not Bond her. His hands were closed to fists around the chair's arms, knuckles white.

"I already said I do!" She snapped at him, "Now answer me!"

He forced his lips to form a smile; she could feel his anger, matching hers. His heart pulsed too quickly, and... he was ready for violence, and she would be happy to give him what he expected, if she wouldn't have her answers. Now! "Forgive me for being cautious with you, Halima. You can hardly blame me, though. Being who and what you are." He said.

Ayende growled, and raised her head to give the man a glare. Unblinking golden eyes met Logain's dark stare. Halima seen Ayende attacking, although it was only a game done on a Trolloc's corpse, it would take a while longer to teach Ayende to kill efficiently. Ayende's eyes lay on Logain's throat. Even with saidin, he would be dead before he could do anything, if Ayende decide to attack. The speed of the huge cat was shocking, it was partly because she tried to encourage it, and partly for... ...she truly hate using this parse ... sheer coincidence. Osan'gar might be able to explain her what she did to give Ayende and the others the speed of a lightning striking. "Does it understand me, Halima?" Logain asked, and she had to quell a start.

"What?" She wondered, still half staring at Ayende, who seemed ready to attack. She motioned and Ayende sat down again near her chair, not before she growled at Logain again and looked at her with what Halima might have called disappointment, if Ayende was human. "You can kill him later, Ayende." She told the big cat and bend to caress the thick fur around the ears. "Now I need the answers he can give me."

Logain simply stare, "Did you hear me?"

"I did," She told him, "Maybe she does. I'm not exactly sure what Ayende can do and what she can't." She had fair ideas, nothing she could be sure about.

"Freedom?" He sounded a trifle surprise. "You named this... thing Freedom?" Ayende growled at him again. Neither her nor the golden female were very much fond of the dark huge man at the moment.

"I did," She replied, by his face, he understood what were the deeper meanings of the name. She didn't think he would even understand the meaning of the word. He knew far less than she did, but he mustn't be scorned. Her current... position was a constant reminder of the surprises this age may bring. Not to mention feeling him in the back of head.

"Why?" He demanded to know, the surge of fury gave her the rest of the question, he wasn't talking about the name anymore.

"Why did I tell Leanna that I was raped?" She wondered, he sat frozen, back as straight as the walls of the Hall of Servants. His face were blank, his eyes storm. "Wasn't I?" He moved, faster than most humans could, but as fast as he was, Ayende was faster, much faster. "It seems that you make it a habit of yours." She said, looking down at him, he laid on the floor. Ayende on his chest, claws unsheathed and her mouth a hair from his throat. "I wouldn't recommend you to hold saidin, Logain." She advised him from her seat on the chair. "Ayende can feel saidin or saidar in a human, and she will rip apart your throat before you would even began to hold enough to do anything useful."

"Do you've any idea what would happen to you if I die?" Logain asked, his voice cracked with fury.

"Not quite," He said once that if an Asha'man dies, so would his warders, it didn't sound... right. "Tell me!" It was a command, not a request. She had rarely had need to use that tone of voice, a voice full of sureness and power.But it often had the desired affect. It had the same affect on Logain; she half thought it wouldn't. That bloody Bond! It made her look at him as if he was a hero out of a legend. Those heroes of the stories she was so fond of before the War of Power began. Before she became one of the Shadow's champions. The thought made her want to flinch. She touched her pocket. An acorn lied there, to remind her what she had became, and why. It was Logain's fault she felt guilt, all but unknown feeling to her before!

What can be expected of a lovesick woman? Ayende sighed in her mind, and do you truly wish to go back. She couldn't even do that! That bloody bond made longing to the days where she all but ruled the entire world impossible. In the coldness of k'doi, the oneness, she could estimate her position in the past and the present. And reach the conclusion that as one of the Chosens her life would have been better. The Gray Woman was only the first attempt; she didn't expect to survive over a month at most. But whatever Ayende thought, she was not in love with Logain. The man's doings were equal to killing her!

Logain was speaking, she understood. And turned her attention to Logain, in her mind, Ayende snorted. "Death is mercy compare to what will happen to you, Halima. I cannot say anything more." She blinked at him, not really sure how she was suppose to feel about it. Not really sure what he had said it, or how truthful he was.

"Have you decided to be truthful with me at last, Logain?' She inquired. Shooing Ayende away, she gave him a hand to help him rise. This time, he took it.

He snorted, "I never lied to you, Halima." He told her, "And before you will tell me, I'm fully aware that you can tell what is not true without lying." He took his seat back, glancing at Ayende once. He still hold her hand, he didn't seem ready to let go of her.

Ayende tensed as the big man pulled the Lady's hand. Halima landed on his lap with a stun cry of shock. "Let go of me!" She demanded. But it had no affect on the big man; the Lady called him Logain. And Ayende couldn't make her mind whatever he was an enemy or a friend. He smelled nice, the Lady's nose was all but unusable, but she noted that too.

"Now you'll answer me." The big man said, by his voice, he wanted to strangle the Lady. But he smelled of no violence.

Humans are strange! Rahien made his way to her, his fur gray and black and deep brown. The Lady named only few of them; it was strange, in truth, Ayende thought. Sometime ago she was tiny; her eyes close and totally depended on her mother for food and warmth. And then... there was coldness and hunger for a long while. Her mother gone, but the Lady was there. Ayende remembered three times where she was commanded to sleep, and woke in a body much larger than she fell asleep in. All she could remember from those times was pain that wasn't pain. The Lady was responsible to this, to make them what they were. Ayende saw her taking a tiny creature with no awareness and changing it to something else, changing it so it would be like Ayende and Rahien. It was fascinating, to feel the small creature’s awareness opened up, like a flower in the sun. Ayende had never seen a flower or the sun, but the Lady seen both, and Ayende was a part of the Lady.

They are strange indeed, Ayende agreed. Rahien was about two thirds of her size, and the Lady said she would let them develop naturally from now. Ayende knew that she hadn't reached her final size. Neither did any of her like in the room. The Lady said that they should be about the size of a small horse. The picture that the Lady had in her mind saying that made Ayende wonder whatever horses where as tasty as Trollocs were.

I like him, Rahien thought slowly, it was the first time he talked. The Lady knew how they could speak to one another, to humans too, but Ayende didn't. It worked, though, and that was what important. Why are they so angry at one another?

Ayende considered the question for a moment, she wasn't quite sure of it herself. Because they are human, I assume. She told Rahien, he wants her. Her heart and soul and mind and body, but She doesn't want to want him, and so she pretend she doesn't. That what make them act so.

Rahien laid his head on his front paws and watched with open curiosity. Why she doesn't want to want him? I want him. His eyes turned to her; can I've him?

Ayende resume her watching on the Lady. He forced himself on her, Rahien. I don't think you would like to have him. And it's the Lady to decide anyway.

He had forced himself? Rahien asked confusingly. Have you lost your nose? Smell him! He would do anything for her; he can't harm her!

Ayende sighed, I don't understand it either, Rahien. She admitted, but she said he forced himself on her, and she didn't lie. Maybe it will be better if you'll listen to them, it could help us understand them.

I doubt it, Rahien thought back grimly. But he returned his eyes to the big man and the Lady on his lap.

"I want to know why!" The big man demanded, the Lady tried to rise, not for the first time. But the dark man was stronger; she didn't stop trying, though. "Stop this!" The man cried finally. The Lady did stop; she sat on the man’s lap and glare at him. "Now, I don't like forcing my will on you like this, Halima!" The man said with dark voice, "But I'll have my answer! Why have you told Leanna that I've raped you?"

"You do it often enough, Logain." The Lady replied, brushing away strands of hair that hang in front of her face. She quivered with rage. "You've done it too many times already. And you dare claim your innocence!"

"I! Did! Not! Rape! You!" He said, each word landing like a whip, harsh and cold.

The Lady snorted, "What do you call it then?" She demanded to know, "As hard as I tried to escape, you are still stronger, in the body, at least. And I couldn't use the power against you then!"

If she dislikes seating on him so much, why isn't she using the power to get away from him now? Rahien asked slowly, obviously confused. But he wasn't half as confused as Ayende was.

She does like to seat on, and to touch him. She would've liked to bed with him as well, I think. But she can't, because what she feels for him was forced on her, and she is too proud to accept it. And he only makes it worse each time they are more than ten heartbeats in the same room with her. Rahien didn't answer, he just watched.

"All I did," The man said, smelling of hard fury and sharp rage, "was to share the bed with you. My bed was full, if I recall correctly." He took a deep breath and released it, "Since when it's a rape, Halima? I never force myself on a woman in my life, I've already told you so! And at the same time I've told you that I don't mean to start with you! I meant what I've said! Need I to make myself clearer?"

The Lady rose from the man, he did not try to stop her this time. "I doubt if you can," The Lady grumbled. "Are you done lecturing? I need some answers of my own; I can't go around without knowing anything about the bloody Bond. It drives me crazy. You drive me crazy!"

"What do you want to know?" The man asked, fury still made his scent sharp, but Ayende smelled coldness in him too.

"The first thing," The Lady said slowly, surprise on her face, "shows me the weave."

The man's right hand closed into a fist around the chair's arm. "You mean to take yourself a warder or two of your own?" His voice reminded Ayende the sound snakes did, just before attacking.

The Lady snorted, "Don't be a fool, what can I do with another man the like of you?" She stopped for a moment, frowning, "It works on women only, isn't it? Or would it work on men, for me?"

The chair's arm broke with a loud sound of thick wood being shredded. The man's voice remained emotionless, "It should work on both males and females, Halima. An Asha’man would take women only as warders, of course. You..." He shrugged. "Here is the weave, although I doubt if you'll ever have to use it."

"I'm surprised that you aren't ordering me not to use it," The Lady said, her eyes focused on nothing Ayende could see, both of them held the power. Ayende knew, the Lady tried to understand how could she knew when she was holding the power and when not, but Ayende couldn't find the words for it. There weren't, she, and all the others, simply knew. Just as they knew what is the difference between the smell of sharp fury and soft amusement, the two emotions the Lady often smelled of most of the time.

"It might save you life, one day." The man replied, "It saved mine, though I'm beginning to regret it." He barked a bitter laugh and watched the Lady blushing. "I'll not stop you from doing anything that might save your life."

"Save returning to the shadow," the Lady murmured. "Or letting me go away."

Rahien made a sound deep in his throat. He will never let you go away to the Shadow, Lady. He can't, and you can't too. Accept it, and live with it, since it cannot be changed, mustn't be changed.

The Lady glared at him,. "Be quite, Rahien. Or else you might find yourself being thrown to the dogs." Rahien didn’t shared share the thought with the man, and now the man was watching the Lady intently, he began to smell of worry.

Why would I like to eat dogs, Rahien wondered, are they as good as Trollocs?

"Rahien?" The man wondered.

"The big black and gray cat near Ayende; his name means Dawn." The Lady replied.

"Have you gave them all names in the Old Tongue?" The man said, he began toying with the broken chair'sarm in his hand.

"Only the big ones," The Lady said, and then she added: "It's different, Logain. Very different from the weave you've used to Bond me! I thought you agreed not to lie to me."

"I didn't," He said, "The weave has to be altered, the weave for a second warder work on the first warder, the second one and the Asha'man who took those two warders. That is part of the reason that both Leanna and Toviene like you. It's also done because if you will not alter the weave upon taking a second warder the first one will die."

"And you? What would it make you feel?" Ayende would have smiled if she could have, as it was. All she could do was mentally giggle at Rahien's direction.

"Does it matter?" The man asked, "Since you seemed so willing to ignore me, I'm pretty sure that you can ignore what I feel for you as well."

The Lady sat on her chair. Ayende raised herhead, and almost instantly was rewarded by the Lady's hand, scratching just behind her ears. That was why humans had hands, it felt so good that... Rahien looked at her, and she could read jealously in the gray eyes that glared at her. She giggled at him once more. "It does." The Lady said finally.

The man Leaned back in his chair, "Good," He murmured in satisfaction, "Now, why have you told Leanna I've raped you?"

"You did," Came the flat replay. Ayende was aware to the way Rahien tensed suddenly.

"The Light burns my soul!" The man exclaimed, and made as if to rise, then he glanced at her direction, and remained in his chair. "I didn't rape you! Do you even know what the word mean!"

The Lady blinked, "I'm no fool, Logain."

"Then why are you insisting that I raped you, I didn't!"

"How do you call what you've done, then?" The Lady asked, shame mingled in her smell for a moment, then gone. "You forced me to remain in the same bed with you, fully aware that I rather sleep with a corpse than with you!"

"Exactly the reason I did it!" The man shouted. "To give you a taste of what you've done to me! Do you think that I like have dead women in my bed?"

The Lady shrugged, amused once again, but hiding it well. "I've seen worse, did worse, in my life, Logain. You are aware of it. You made me tell you all of this. You made me feel guilty about it!"

"So that was the way you have decided to get back at me?" The man demanded, his smell became dark and dangerous.

"I told Leanna nothing but the truth!" The Lady shouted. A ball of fire appeared in the air and sped toward the man, Ayende closed her eyes hastily; the fireball was twice as brighter as the sun she saw only in the Lady's memories. The fire was gone, but before her eyes danced strange shapes in every color. She blinked few times until they were gone.

"Are you talking the same language as I'm?" The man demanded, "I didn't rape you." He exhale a breath slowly, "Why am I trying to talk with you? You don’t even bother to listen to what I say!"

The Lady began to laugh, so hard that she would have fall off her chair if not for the man catching her. "What is bloody wrong with you?" He demanded to know. Holding her as far as he could while supporting most of her weight.

"What isn't?" The Lady chuckled as the stream of laugher finally died. The man left her, but she took a step closer to him, wary was as heavy in the man as amusement that edged madness was in the Lady. Ayende did not whined, but she had a terrible urge to do so. Do something to make the Lady return to the way she always was. Not this half mad creature that wrapped its arms around the man's neck. "First," The Lady said, "there am me being female. Second, there is this body affecting my mind. You've no idea how strong that can be, even stronger than what the Bond did to me. And of course there is the Bond, and you. And there is also that I was nearly gotten myself killed yesterday. Lews Therin might decide any moment he doesn't trust me still, despite the Bond, and kill me. And there is Osan'gar, who knows me better than I know myself. And if he would like, he can simply create a shadowspawn whose only reason for existence would be my death. And there are you, who try hard to drive me crazy, with large success, I must add. There is this barbaric language! And there are my cats, should I call them Valdar Asha'man, those who defend the guardians? I can't seem to decide. And there is the Dark One; there can be no doubt that he already had something in his mind that would be worse than death at the moment. I can't imagine something worse than death, but he's planning something still. But more than anything else, I've you! And you asking what is wrong with me?" The Lady took another small step and hit the man's chest. She held none of saidin this time. She hit him again. "I hate you! I really hate you!"

Is that the way human shows hate? Rahien inquired after a while, is she trying to bite off his tongue? The thought carried too much amusement to be sincere.

Ayende jumped on him, her claws bare and mouth roaring. She didn't like Rahien very much at the moment, by the time she reached the smaller male, he was no longer there. But she wasn't about to give up.

***

Leanna pushed the door open with angry curse. Toviene told her that she must return to whatever it was she was doing. Something about kitchens and Asha'man and food; From the few times she was in the Black Tower, Leanna didn't want to know what the woman might have meant, cooking wasn't something she could work her mind around, when it came to the Black Tower. Asha'man needed to eat, just like everybody else, but she couldn't quite grasp the idea of Asha'man cooking. She, however, had no intention to help in the kitchens, and she wasn't done with Logain.

After Halima left, all but sobbing, she went to find Toviene. What the woman had with kitchens anyway? Toveine was as angry with Logain as she herself was, but when they finally found and dragged him to a private talk, he acted as if he knew nothing of what they were talking about. The problem was, she believed him, and believed Halima as well. She was quite good as telling when one was lying and when one wasn't. She knew they both told the blunt truth. But it was impossible!

She had no time to tell it to Logain, almost as soon as he understood what they were talking about he stormed away, searching for Halima. She was about to chase him when Toviene said that Logain wouldn't harm Halima. Considering what they knew about the Bond, he couldn't. This made Halima's story impossible. On the other hand, as Toviene had to point up for her, there were other possibilities. Halima might have convinced herself she was raped, while she didn't mind to bed with Logain. Or Halima might have wanted to lie with Logain, only to change her mind later. Or, what seemed most probable, Halima somehow lied and she didn’t notice this. After all, as Toviene pointed out, they should have felt it if such thing happened.

At that point, Toviene left disgustfully, and Leanna went on searching for Logain. Not that she had to trouble much, with the bond. Which was how she found herself opening the door and staring at the couple that stood in the center of the room.

It was strange, the way human mind worked. She noticed the kitties that she and Toviene worked so hard to gather. As far as she saw, only few of them remained the size they were, the others grown, to sizes impossible! A cat with pale red-brown fur, as big as most dogs, chased a smaller cat in black and gray. The others moved away from the two cats' way, but beside that, their eyes were focused on Logain and Halima. Which brought into her attention Halima and Logain again.

Two figures becoming one in a kiss that made them forget all about the outside world. Leanna had hard time not blushing; she felt the kiss, through Logain. Blushing or no blushing, she paid closed attention to what Logain felt, mainly surprise, but it wasn't his emotions that she had interested in now. As close attention as she paid to Halima; considering that the woman claimed that the man raped her, she showed no sign of it. She also showed no sign that she had any wish to break the kiss, ever.

Logain stepped back, tried to, Halima's arms were around his neck, and he ended up simply dragging the dark woman with him. "What have you done to Halima?" He asked breathlessly.

"What?" Halima stare at him, and Leanna began to wonder whatever she should give them some privacy. As well as she began to wonder if this was how they have kissed last night, when Logain supposedly raped Halima. Something she seriously begun to doubt now.

"I asked" Logain explained patiently, "What have you done with Halima? This is not how Halima behave."

Halima took a step back and tried to slap him. Laughing, he caught her arm just before it landed on his cheek. "Let go of me, you..." Her mouth worked, but she said nothing, to Leanna it seemed that she had hard time to choose between all the curses she knew.

"Should I leave you two alone?" She asked softly, she should have been mad with jealously, all she felt was amused fondness. "I can return later, if you wish some privacy, Halima." Her voice gave them both a start. They didn't even notice her! Halima’s cheeks reddened.

Logain was dark in his face as well, but it was harder to know with him. "That would be unnecessary." Halima said with hard voice.

"Sadly," Logain added, she and Halima both glared at the fool man. He didn't even notice, he never did. Not even when he was gentled. "Have you come here to give me another lecture about how I should behave toward Halima?" He raised an eyebrow and looked so beautiful that she wanted to kiss him and, at the same time, arrogant enough to have his ears boxed. His right hand closed into a fist, fingernails buried in the skin, "Or have you came to see how I force myself over Halima?" He was angry, she realized, very angry, maybe he had right to be angry, but why was he angry with her. It was Halima who lied.

"I think I came here to lecture," She replied truthfully, his eyes widen with rage, but he moved no muscle. "That would be unnecessary, apparently." Halima's blush deepened; her cheeks seemed to be ready to go on fire. Logain was very close to losing his temper, not something to be expected to. She hadn't seen him losing that self-control of him, not because of rage, at least. She suspected he could be as bad as Halima; few could top that woman’s tempers. "What have you done to them, Halima?" Leanna asked; her surprised was real. Three days ago there wasn't a single kitty that wouldn't have fit comfortably inside her fist. Now she saw that some of the kitties that she and Toviene worked so hard to gather were the size of dogs! The others had reach full size already; it was purely impossible.

The woman hesitated, her cheeks still red, and Leanna could almost feel the woman's relief as the subject changed. She walked the few steps to a chair with its right arm broken and sat down. "I doubt if the word in the Old Tongue would mean anything even to those who know it, like you, Leanna." The raven hair woman said, the cats were like a moving carpet on the floor, constantly shifting places. "The best translation I can offer is not exactly correct, but it will do. I manipulated certain variables in the most basic units of their body, thus causing the desired resulted, if I'm lucky."

Logain stared, "All this can be said in one word, and you call our language barbaric?"

"Yes," Halima replied immediately, her eyes shined with green fire, "And yes yet again."

"Before you would try to kill each other, or kiss each other to death," Leanna shouted; the way they stared at each other, each of those two options was possible. They blushed together, too. "Will you be kind enough to tell me what this manipulating variables means, and make in simple!"

Halima moved uneasily on her seat, Leanna took the only other chair in the room. "Every creature in the world," Halima began, then frowned and corrected herself, "Almost every creature in the world has... building instructions somewhere inside him. To tell the body how it suppose to built itself."

"Who write this building instructions," Logain inquired, "the Creator?' By Halima's laugh, that wasn't the right answer.

It took the woman a long time to stop laughing ... it seemed that whatever she felt, she felt strongly, rage or laugher, and nothing in-between ... and she still giggled, answering: "Your parents are the ones who gave you this, you're a mix of their... building instruction," she began laughing again, saying that. She rose a hand, stopping any from talking, "Now, before the War of Power Aginor was named Ishar Morrad Chuain, and he was the world's greatest researcher in that field. Not only he was among the strongest of the strongest, but also matched in that area by none. He forsook the Light because he became bored with dealing with plants all day. I forsook the Light because I wanted immortality," She added before any of them could say a word. "Aginor created all the Shadowspawns for us. Unfortunately, he was also as mad as Ishmael was, if not more, half my time in the War was dedicated to making sure he would concentrate on what he was suppose to do, not on useless research." Logain was as still as any statue Leanna had seen. What she felt from him... not quite distaste, and not quite fear and disappointment, there was no name for this emotion.

"So you learned from Aginor how to create Shadowspawns," Logain voice was angry, accusing, Halima might have winced, Leanna couldn't have been sure.

"I did," She said coldly, a queen on her throne, though a broken one, "But the Valdar Asha'man are no shadowspawn. They have nothing to do with shadowspawns in any way, save maybe their stomach." Had she truly named the creatures Valdar Asha'man? Those who guard the guardians.

"Their stomach," She kept all emotions from her voice, she never dreamed to take part in such a conversation, though she might have nightmares about this.

"Yes, they like to eat shadowspawns, so I had to make some changes in their stomach, so they wouldn't be poisoned."

"What other changes have you made in them?" Logain seemed in ease, leaning on the wall and looking at Halima with dark eyes, until you notice the way he held himself, with every muscle tensed, a lion just before the attack.

"The size, of course," Halima began, "they would be the size of a horse, six feet high, more or less, with all the other dimensions matching the height." Logain mutter an oath silently. "I also accelerated the speed they would grow in," Certainly, considering what Leanna saw, three days ago there weren't a single one bigger than her fist! "I couldn't wait, you see. And the fastest growing rate isn't enough. As it is, it takes them about three months to reach full size, and it's too slow for my need. I had to use saidin again to make them big enough in the short while I have."

"How, and why?" Logain asked.

Halima opened her mouth few times, and then she sighed. "It's hard to explain, in this language, at least. You might say that I poured energy into them, and made sure it would be directed toward growing. You can double their size that way, in few hours only. And I'm strong enough to take care for several of them in the same time. It's dangerous, though, if you are not careful, you end up with nothing but a dead corpse. As for why," She Leaned back in her chair, her eyes closed. "I'm dead, Logain. Dead already despite my heart beating, I was dead the moment you took me as... your warder. The Dark One must have already informed all the other Chosens about my... betrayal. And ordered them to kill me. That Gray Woman was only the first attempt, they would continue, until they are succeed." Logain growled, deep in his throat, sounding hardly human suddenly. "I don't meant to die easily, however, I made the cats because they might delay my death."

"Quite a guard, you have made for yourself," Leanna wasn't sure what made her say that.

"I understand that in the White Tower, a warder should defend his Aes Sedai until his last drop of blood." A dark smile appeared on Halima's lips, tired smile. "I cannot allow myself to do so, nor I can allow Logain to die. Considering that I would die along with him." Leanna could feel a vile taste in Logain's throat. "Now I can defend Logain, until the Valdar's last drop of blood." She chuckled bitterly for a moment. This time Leanna was sure, Logain did wince.

The silence broke by Halima's voice; neither her nor Logain seemed to have anything to say. "I tried to make something more, and there I wasn't so lucky." A shiver ran through her, Logain took a step forward, and stopped. "When I first woke up in Shayol Ghul, I realize just how cruel Lews Therin trap was. Aginor and I were trapped just beneath the surface, Ishmael was only half trapped, he was the only one of us that realized what was happening and was able to act in time. He managed to keep his body from the turning of the wheel. I didn't, and neither was Aginor. I woke in a body that felt three thousands years on its flesh." Halima raised a gentle hand into the air and examined it, delicate fingers opening and closing, "It almost worth it, being a woman, just to escape that rotten body." She stared directly at Logain now, "Those who touched saidin before it was cleansed had been rotten alive, after they have gone mad, most often, but before as well. I know what it mean to live in a body that had been corrupted so." Something that might have been a laugh or a sob gave Leanna a start. "When I first tried to talk, after waking, my tongue became dust inside my mouth. Then, the Dark One wasn't strong enough to give me a new body, I'm not sure that the Dark One was even completely aware for the world at the time, he was too busy breaking through the seals. It was Ishmael that commanded us then. And we were sent to the Eye of the World, and died." The woman's face was in the color between white and green. "In the meantime, I had to find a way to communicate, without a tongue." She took a deep breath, calming herself, "I found one, necessary is the parent of all inventions, so they said in my time."

"What it was?" Leanna asked, she had to fight weaves of pity, force her voice to sound just as it always did. Halima wasn't one to accept pity lightly.

That was what it was, Halima said. Logain gasped, and Leanna felt herself jumping. It was Halima's voice, but it hadn't reached her through her ears. "The Light burns my soul to ashes!" Logain whispered in awe. "Hold that weave again, Halima. If I see it once more I could use it."

Halima nodded, she grinned slightly to their shock. "The weave creates the desire thought pattern inside one's mind. It's a little like compulation, but for information only."

"It's also very much like the bond," Logain noted. Leanna muttered few curses; it wasn't fair! She couldn't see what they were talking about.

"Maybe," Halima said doubtfully. "I'll have to think about it. But I don't think so, it doesn't create a permanent result."

"But how it has anything to do with the cats, those Valdar Asha'man of yours?" Leanna inquired.

"I hoped to make spies out of them, and I stretched my talent in that direction to its limits and more in order to give them the ability to do so without having the One Power."

"So they could report back to you." Logain sounded fascinated, just as she was.

"That was the idea; although I hoped to use this ability in order to see what they see, hear what they hear, at the exact time this is happening. It didn't worked as well as I expected."

"Oh?"

On the other hand, maybe it worked just right. This time, the voice that spoke inside her mind wasn't Halima's, despite carrying stunning resemblance to the dark woman's voice. A golden cat, the biggest she have seen so far, the one who was running all over the place not that long ago, raised from the floor, a small kitty with dark brown fur slide of the big cat as it moved forward.

Logain muttered something about needing to seat down. He stood near her chair in just few long strides, pulling her out of the chair as if she weighted no more than any of the small kitties. He landed on the chair hard enough to make it crack warningly. She was just about to say something about her knees not supporting her body very well at the moment when he sent his hands and sat her on him. Halima grinned amusingly at her direction all the while. "It talked!" Leanna hardly recognized her voice, so thick was shock and surprise.

"She talked," Halima corrected him, "And she has a name, Ayende." Leanna wanted to wince, Halima played with fire, teasing Logain so. Why under the Light did she have to name the cat Freedom? Sooner or later someone would tell Logain what it meant. She noticed that her mind was off, and set it back to what was important. It was hard, Light! Her mind wanted to travel at any direction but at those cats. Her eyes focused on Halima. The woman showed no sign that showed she was aware that Logain was holding another woman on his. But Leanna had seen how the woman looked at other women whenever Logain was around, always checking whatever he noticed the other women. Leanna didn't think that Halima was even aware that she did that. Leanna, however, was well aware to her doing when she did just that. She just couldn't avoid it.

And had Logain put any notice to other women, she would have... she had no idea how she would react to such betrayal of him. Logic told her that he had betrayed her trust already, twice. Bonding Toviene and Halima, but that was different. It felt different, at least, and she couldn't care why.

Logain voice was very deep, very commanding, and had almost hypnotic quality. Leanna thought she could listen to it forever, "Halima, tell me everything about those Valdar of yours!"

"I offer you to trade information, Logain Albar. You cheated before, now are you ready to play fair?"

"I wasn't aware that you know the meaning of play fair." Logain shot back.

Halima laughed, "I sure do, I just never agreed to be limited by fool rules." Leanna hide a smile. "Now, tell me what I want to know about the bond. And maybe I'll tell you what I know."

"What do you want to know?" Leanna was the one saying that, Logain wasn't about to agree to such bargain, but he could be pushed to it. And she wanted to know about the bond as much as Halima wished.

"Everything," Halima said immediately. "But you can start with what it does to me. And how it does it."

"I don't know how it do it," Logain shrugged, "It works, that is all that matters. As for what it does, the first thing is to put your emotions and physical state in my head, and mine in yours. Then it force trust on both of us."

"Explain," Leanna ordered, twisting around so she could look at his face comfortably.

Logain sighed, "How can I explain something I'm not certain about myself?" He wondered, "What happen is that both warder and his bondholder can not break the other's trust in them."

"The reason why I can belong to the Shadow no longer." Halima said, "If it was someone else, Demandred or Osan'gar, for example, I would have my liege to the Shadow still, isn't it?" Logain nodded slowly, frozen. "But wouldn't it pull you to the Shadow as well, if it affect both of us at the same time, I mean."

"Halima," the big man sighed, "the Bond does not work this way. It's not equal in all ways, maybe in some, you may even say that in most, but not in all."

"I noticed," Halima said dryly. Then she shocked her head, releasing the thought. How could she do it, with something that important? "Carry on, Logain. What other traps I'm to expect?"

Logain's face might have been carved of stone, Leanna had a feeling that he was weighting the scales, considering what to tell and what not to. "What isthere to hide that you are so careful about even with me and Halima? And that heartbeats after you stated that you trust us both!" She demanded angrily. She pulled herself to her feet, ignoring what sounded very much like a regretful sigh from Logain's direction.

"Nothing that can risk you," Logain replied, "On the other hand, it might risk me. Pardon me then, ladies, for wishing to keep my hide whole."

Halima opened her mouth, and then closed it; fury was radiated from her suddenly. Leanna couldn't feel Halima's emotions. But Logain could, he wavered, then stared at Halima with eyes as wide as they would go. Even without feeling the woman's emotions, it was easy to say that the woman was angrier than any other time Leanna had seen. Face blank, green eyes empty, she revealed not a single emotion. Yet... Leanna couldn't take her eyes from the shorter woman, she had seen woman of great inner power before, woman that would have look regal in rags. Men too, although that seemed far more rare, Logain was one of them, and Rand al'Thor as well, and Gareth Bryne, and Agelmar Jagad, and few others.

Halima, on the other hand, could make any of them look like beggars. Her presence demanded immediate and complete obedience. She clad herself in black silk, breach and coat that reflect the light weakly, a small circle on the left side of her breast, an oak burning. Still, she was the most commanding human being Leanna had ever met, and that included more nobles than she bothered to count, most of the kings and queens of the world, most of the living Aes Sedai, five Amyralin Seats, three False Dragons and the Dragon Reborn. Leanna even met Cadsuane once, just before the last battle in the Aiel War. It would be interesting, to see those two meat, from a safe place, that is. Leanna knew that the woman was no weak will, otherwise, she would’ve have managed to survive holding as much as the One Power as she could hold. But this display was new. Suddenly it occurred to Leanna that she had probably never met someone as old as Halima. It wasn’t uncommon for an Aes Sedai to live beyond one hundred years. And Cadsuane was rumored to be well beyond two hundred years old. But even excluding the time Halima spent in the Dark One’s prison. There was a reason why age was considered a factor in the Aes Sedai’s hierarchy. And now Leanna faced the justification for that order. Halima radiated anger and command in equal amounts, seemingly unaware of it. The way she looked, she could’ve out willed any Aes Sedai Leanna met. But what sparked that, Leanna could not tell, that Logain hide something from them was not enough, not even for Halima.

Still, the woman made no move to attack or to unleash her temper. She stared at Logain, not even glaring, but he paled. "You wanted to know about the Valdar, Logain." She said, her voice chiming pleasantly. Hot fury burn fast, but it's cold urge to revenge that one had to worry about, why did she reminded in that old Domani saying now? "You know their size, I increased the speed they can move and act and attack. At need, they can moveabout five times faster than any human or Trolloc can see. Three times above what any Myradraal can begin to understand that he’s under attack. They link themselves to a single person, gender to match. Instead of their ability to transfer what they see or hear to the one they've linked themselves to, they seem to conquer themselves a part in that one's mind, making it their own. Ayende is I, a part of my mind that she made her own, a part of my mind that control the Valdar’s body. But at the same time, it’s a different personality altogether." All that was delivered in a mild tone, clear and silent, but the words still seemed to Leanna like whips, she was only glad that the woman's anger, be it reason whatever it be, wasn't directed at her. Halima didn't stop to breath throughout the whole speech. Now she took one deep breath, and her eyes did glare now, Logain took one step back, a defensive expression on his face, a wondering expression too. "I believe that that should be all." Halima finished, and trotted for the door, she didn't even bother to open it, three steps before she reached it, the door exploded in a bloom of fire so hot that the rock began to melt around the doorframe. The rook itself began to burn, Halima passed through that gate of fire without a single hesitation, the big golden female raced after her, stopping once to growl at Logain direction.

"Well, well, well." Leanna muttered slowly, her eyes focused on what was, once, the entrance to the room. "I think you're deep in troubles."

"Tell me about it!" Logain grumbled; she frightened him, Halima, not Leanna. The way she suddenly flared with fury so suddenly. More so because she controlled her temper, it meant something bad, he suspected.

"And you don't have any idea what she was so angry about, I assume." Leanna said, she was only a head below his own height, taller than most men. Thin and tall and beautiful, with eyes that touched him in a way he never wanted to be touch.

"Little less than you do," He told his willowy warder.

"It just might be connected to you holding secrets from us, Logain." Her tone was as cold as winter heart. "Don't you trust us enough to ..." Her eyes widened suddenly, her voice muffled so suddenly that she nearly choked on her own tongue. She glared at him suddenly, Halima's anger was cold and focus, the first time he felt anything cold from the woman who once belonged to the Forsakens. Halima's emotions were hot and strong, always, but this new cold anger startled him. Now he felt its imitation in Leanna, far less, but the feeling was quite the same. Leanna turned away, her hands gathering her skirts as she chased Halima through a doorframe made of rock, a doorframe that burning in red hot fire.

Logain didn't even try to follow either woman; instead, he began to walk the length of the room. He hated it. This dark place, lighten only by balls of fire made of saidin, not only this room, but also the entire Dragonmount. He hated what titles he now carried as well. And ... no, he could never hate neither one of his warders. He could hate the bond that bound the four of them together. And he did, with all his heart. Cats, those creature Halima named Valdar, fled from him as he walked near them, not a single one skimmed through the door, away, to find some of the freedom Logain had lost. Logain neither noticed nor cared.

"What is the different between forcing a Bond on a woman and raping her?" He asked no one in particular, he tried to kick a cat that stood in his way, one of the biggest there, mass of brown and black. The cat evaded the kick which stunning speed, its body becoming a blur before it rest still, ten feet away; Logain still hadn't recovered his balance after the kick.

He focused his eyes on that blasted cat, he wanted to draw saidin and truly blast the thing. But he couldn't, because of bloody Halima. "I hate it!" He told the cat, he had a feeling that the cat agreed with him. This cannot be true, Halima must've lied; cats would never be able to think. It was just a trick, like the way she put her thought in his mind. He truly wanted to know how the bloody woman did it, of course, as long as she didn't put that pretty neck of her on the hangman's block, he should care nothing for what she did. "If you're suppose to be so smart, kitty." He told the cat, did he have to wait for saidin to be cleansed to go mad? "Tell me, what is the difference between taking a warder and raping a woman?" He quivered with the urge to break something, to unleash that fury in him. He thought that Toviene said something about the Asha'man making a room for training the sword. Cursing, he went out to find the room.

The brown and black cat followed him. Logain knew he must have gone mad already, but he was sure that the thing mocked him!

"Where are you going?" Breathless Leanna asked when she finally caught up with Halima. The woman stood with her back turned to her, leaning against a wall in one of those Light's forsaken endless corridors. Leanna thought she might be crying, or laughing.

"Where can I go?" The woman growled, there were no tears in her voice, or laugher. "Where would I go if I could?" She turned suddenly and faced her, now the anger was clearly visible, a mask of fury controlled by the last fringes of iron hard will. The woman rarely showed that strong will of her, for some reason. "You do understand that whatever he hide, he hide from us!"

"I figured it out," Leanna replied.

"I could understand, I think, if he would have hidden few things about the Bond from me, being who and what I am." Halima continued; Leanna doubted if the woman ev